· Normal is a dryer setting.

decannulation

The child who never was

I’ve seen quite a bit lately on Twitter about grieving your child’s special needs. Most often, this applies to autistic kids (kids with autism? I won’t get into a semantic debate with anyone), but it also pertains, really, to any disability – whether “visible” or “invisible.” And I think it’s a load of crap.

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Ear surgery tomorrow

Tomorrow we have to be at Children’s Hospital at 9:30 for surgery. Not that the surgery itself is that early; no, it will be about two hours later, around 11:00 or 11:30. Most of the day will be waiting on our part – waiting for them to come and take her back, waiting for the surgery to be done, waiting as Namine is in recovery. The ear surgery is not likely to be long, but they do still need to put Namine to sleep.

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What could never be

Sometimes we find ourselves pining for something lost, perhaps for something that never even was. It sneaks up on us, Jessica and I, and suddenly we realize that Namine is almost three years old. She is moving, she talking, she is more independent every day. Where is our little baby girl? She’s still small – she’ll always be small – but she’s not small anymore. She doesn’t have a baby face anymore; she has a grown up face, so it seems to us. Can’t we have our baby back?

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