Namine was playing in the tub. Having finished washing up, I wanted her to get out quickly.

I told her, “Put your otter toy away.”

“It’s a seal, Daddy.”

“That’s what I said.”

The eight year old gave a melodramatic sigh. “No, you said otter.”

To which I responded, “Well, you otter put it away now.”

She glared at me. “You’re not funny, Dad.”

Husband. Daddy. Programmer. Artist. I'm not an expert, I just play one in real life.