8 Comments

  • Barbara
    at · Reply

    You put yourself in a very difficult position in that last sentence. I encourage you to back off from that dichotomy. For both of you. And your wife. Perhaps you are just using hyperbole to express your pain at the thought of causing her pain. But similar to the seriousness of a weapons comment as one boards a plane, references to suicide are not to be taken lightly.

    There are parents who have been and are in your position.

    I’m going to suggest this video for you and tell you a bit about it so you can choose to watch it, or not. This is a TED production. If you are not familiar with TED, they are presentations that are inspiring and thoughtful. Amy Mullins is a bilateral lower extremity amputee after optional amputation of her two non-functional congenital legs. See what she thinks about her growing-up and about adversity.
    http://www.ted.com/talks/aimee_mullins_the_opportunity_of_adversity.html

    Namine needs you to get her through this. You can do it.

  • Cr Eiche
    at · Reply

    Barbara, whoever you are, G-d bless you for sharing that video link. Namine is definitely not disabled.

    Paul & Jessica, I can’t pretend to know the pain you’re going through as parents. As a former caregiver, I know that sometimes you have to make painful choices to give the one you care for a chance at the best outcome, knowing that there will be long term physical pain. The memory of the physical pain decreases with time. The mental pain if “what if” or “should I have” is far more excruciating and lasts forever.

  • Paul
    at · Reply

    I’d say hyperbole is more likely. I wouldn’t kill myself as long as my wife and daughter are still alive. I’m upset that Namine has to go through this, and I’m angry – mostly with myself – that I am the one to put her through it. My hope, however, is that one day, even if she doesn’t forgive me, she understands that I was acting on behalf of her best interests. That I was trying to give her as much as I possibly could in this unfair world.

  • Michele
    at · Reply

    you are an amazing parent. Namine will forget the pain. She’ll never be alone, so she’ll never have to deal with the pain alone. That’s important. We make the best decisions we can as parents, God will bless those decisions and we need to leave the outcome with him. A tough thing too do, I know! We’re all in this together. I love you all.

  • Kelly
    at · Reply

    You guys are doing great! I know the first few years are hard. Do you listen to the doctors or to your gut. Alex was born with his knees and hips dislocated and was casted for the first three months of his life. We had to bring him to the hospital once a week for a re-cast and it did bring his knees back to the right position. We are now faced with a surgery decision as well do we try to put his hips in place or just leave them. Does Alex have the muscules it will take to hold the bones in place if we decide to do the surgery? If not and we do the surgery then we put him through an unneeded surgery. There is a reason God made these special little ones. How much feeling does Namine have in her legs/feet? Alex also has club feet and we might need to do something with the one foot that is getting worse. Keep looking to God for comfort and reassurance. Pray that the decisions he lays on your heart is the right one and God will allow Namine to complete what he put her here for. My prayers are with your family in this hard time. Seeing people suffer is always hard but it is gut renching when it is your own child. Please know that we are here for you. Not that are children have the same abilitites but that they do share the fact that they have different abilities.Let us know if you need anything

  • Stacey
    at · Reply

    Paul.. you and your family truly amaze me. Your heartfelt blogs… they are such an encouragement to me. Know that little Namine is in our Lord’s hands… as you all are. Continuing to pray for you all.

  • Cr Eiche
    at · Reply

    I’m glad she is doing better today. I hope you get to go home tomorrow. Love you all.

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